Noooooo. . . . !

The day did not get off to a good start. I’d got my arm band and was waiting to be called back for labs and to have my port accessed, and their secret special computer program crashed. Since it’s a system-wide program, it was down everywhere in the building, and possibly in all the Covenant facilities. After about 45 minutes, they announced that the system was down and they estimated it would be back up in an hour. I got there at 8:00 a.m. and it was sneaking up on a quarter after 9:00 by then. In the meantime, the waiting room was filling up like an airport when they’ve cancelled flights at the last minute. Somebody got the bright idea to go old, OLD school and fill out paper forms for each patient based on what data they could access locally.

My labs were supposed to be drawn at 8:00 and my appointment with the oncologist was supposed to be at 9 o’clock. It was 9:30 before I got my labs and access. (The computers were down in the labs, too. Fortunately they could make printouts from each piece of lab testing equipment and hand carry them upstairs, so he had my lab results.) It was 10:30 before I hit the oncologist’s waiting room and almost 11:00 before I got to see him. He is neither reticent nor stoic, and I expected him to be sizzling and spitting like a drop of water on a hot griddle considering the computer problems, but he was remarkably calm.

I have begun to experience some peripheral neuropathy on the very tips of my fingers in the form of numbness, worse on the thumb, index and middle fingers of my right hand, which I reported. I have just started noticing this in the last week or two. He said the culprit is the vincristine (Oncovin) and we can stop that. I made the remark that I was glad this was my last session, and he seemed surprised and asked me if I wanted to stop treatment, which he didn’t advise. That was when we discovered there had been a miscommunication. He had told me I would have 6 sessions, and I was under the impression that we were counting from my first session in February. Nope. Guess again. What he meant was that I was to get 6 doses of Rituxan, of which I’ve only had 3 counting the one I got today. This was very depressing news as this whole business has been going on since February and it has been just slowly but surely grinding me down. (Of course, it’s not nearly so bad as it was in 2018 when I had four hospitalizations, a heart attack and pneumonia and was on bottled oxygen for a month . . . ) He is going to give me an extra week of recovery time before I go in for #4, on July 18. (yay.) This means I might be done with this mess by September. Sigh.

Needless to say, I was kind of bummed. He did stop the vincristine, so all I got today was cyclophosphamide, prednisone, and Rituxan. Even so, it was a quarter til 6:00 before I hit the pavement.

On my way home, when I got to the intersection of 19th Street and Quaker Avenue, instead of going straight, I made a left turn onto 19th and went ALL the way out to the closest of the four Arby’s in town. (They have the meats!). North-south Quaker crosses east-west 19th Street between its 4400 block and its 4300 block. The Arby’s I go to is in the 5700 block, way the heck out past LCU and the city library branch where I go to knitting group. The other three locations are on 82nd Street. But I had my heart set on a beef gyro and a mess of curly fries. Guess what. They were out of their special gyro sauce. I said to give me one anyway and give me a couple packets of Horsey Sauce. She discounted the price a dollar because of no gyro sauce, which was the best thing that had happened to me all day (until I ate my gyro and curly fries, that is!).

In the knitting news, I’ve started in on baby booties again, which I haven’t made in years. I’m writing a new pattern for them which will appear on Knits From The Owl Underground as soon as I finish bouncing off the walls from the prednisone. It’s the No-Tears Toe-Up Baby Booties with Fleegle Heel and Crocheted Cuff Edging. I’m test knitting the new pattern using left over yarn from the 9-Bladed Circular Baby Blanket based on this circular shawl pattern. The toe starts with a Turkish cast on of 14 stitches and increases to 28 stitches total, so they go fast. I’ve got plenty of the Botticelli Red Malabrigo Sock yarn. My thought was to make a pair to match the dress.

The Fleegle Heel is a gusseted heel (versus the humpty-eleven other types of heel construction). Some heel constructions (e. g., short row heel) tend to leave a noticeable gap/hole at the end of the decreases, but this method doesn’t. It has a long Bobby Socks style, fold over cuff worked in 1 x 1 ribbing. The feedback I’ve gotten on this cuff style is that they really stay on well.

When I came back from my Walmart run yesterday, I noticed they’ve done some of what my step grandfather (AKA “Grandma-paw”) used to call “landscraping” on the pergola by where I park my car. They’ve given the wisteria on the pergola a haircut, done some planting, and put in a walkway.

Some day when the weather isn’t going to be hotter than a $2 pistol firing uphill, I’ll have to go sit and knit for a bit.

I’m trying to stay positive. Just a matter of hitching up my big girl panties and getting on with it. An Arby’s gyro and curly fries and some Cherry vanilla HäagenDazs® ought to perk me up. Think I’ll sit down and eat it.

In the Home Stretch?

Wednesday the 22nd, I start my sixth round of chemo. Supposedly this is the last one for now. I assume at some point in the near future, I’ll get a CT scan to assess tumor shrinkage. So, I have to be there at 8 o’clock in the morning on Wednesday and with labs, seeing the oncologist, and receiving the chemo, I’m going to be at JACC all day, like until 5:30 or 6 in the evening. Thursday, I go for the Udenyca shot that stimulates my body to make more white blood cells to replace the ones the chemo kills. They didn’t give me the times for the three sessions of IV fluids, so I will have to call and leave a message to remind them. The chemo must be working. At least the lymph nodes under my jaw have shrunk and I’m starting to have a chin again.

I’ve been sleeping a lot lately. It’s as if I know I’m going to be awake from Wednesday until probably Friday because of all the stupid prednisone, and I’ m trying to get ahead of the game. I’ve been reading a lot, too, mostly in bed with my feet up. I read two books yesterday.

I got my table assembled and put in place. The size is just perfect. I need to make a Wal-Mart run (before Wednesday) to get some other stuff (like TP!) and when I do get it together to go, I need to get a roll of that plastic shelf-liner like I put over my computer desktop to protect the top of it from spills. I got the least obnoxious color pattern is the faux marble, and I’ll get some more of that.

Still haven’t repotted anything yet. Manaña.

In the knitting news, I’ve started on the baby dress.

The pattern calls for Malabrigo Sock yarn which I got in “Botticelli red,” which is kind of a brick/oxblood red. The pattern is two pages long (so not very complicated). The top part went fast, but the skirt is 9 inches long, on a size US 4 (3.5 mm) needle. At 10 rows = 1 inch. That’ll take a while. Still, I might have time to make the older sister the same dress with the same yarn. I have the yarn. We’re talking Christmas card photo/Hallmark moment. Of course, I don’t have to send it before the baby comes. I could hold off and send it in, like August or September. I was thinking of making some booties, and maybe a sweater, but Richardson, Tx. In August, or September. Not sweater weather. I may make some booties anyway, just because. I haven’t made any in a while, and I have a sock set of good ChiaoGoo double pointed, stainless steel needles now, not those jive plastic needles that warped. And I have yarn left from the baby blanket, both the pink and the rose. Hmmm. Still haven’t finished the sun hat.

We’ve already hit 107 F/41.6 C degrees here and had a whole week of 100+ degree weather — and it’s only June. We may be gearing up for a long, hot summer. Hope not. I just looked at the highs for the next 10 days and they range between 94 F/34.4 C and 100 F/37.7 C. Not good. No rain in the forecast either. Not even partly cloudy.

Books Read in 2022

35.	Blood and Iron, Bear, Elizabeth
34.	When Blood Lies, Harris, C. S. 
33.	The Book of Atrix Wolfe, McKillip, Patricia (reread)
32.	*Captive Mate, Greyson, Eliot
31.	*A Very Armitage Christmas, Greyson, Eliot
30.	*Alpha’s Warlock, Greyson, Eliot
29.	*Lost Touch, Greyson, Eliot
28.	The Faded Sun:  Kutath, Cherryh, C. J.
27.	The Faded Sun:  Shon’Jir, Cherryh, C. J.
26.	The Faded Sun:  Kesrith, Cherryh, C. J. 
25.	*The Long and Winding Road, Klune, T. J.
24.	*The Art of Breathing, Klune, T. J.
23.	*Who We Are, Klune, T. J. 
22.	*Bear, Otter, and the Kid, Klune, T. J. 
21	*Under the Whispering Door, Klune, T. J.
20.	*The House in the Cerulean Sea, Klune, T. J. 
19.	*A Shadow in Summer, Abraham, Daniel
18.	*Fluke and the Faithless Father, Burns, Sam
17.	*The Fantastic Fluke, Burns, Sam
16.	*The Tale of Two Seers, Cooper, R. 
15.	*A Boy and His Dragon, Cooper, R. 
14.	*Time’s Convert, Harkness, Deborah
13.	*Killashadra, McCaffrey, Anne
12.	*Crystal Singer, McCaffrey, Anne
11.	*Clay White, Cooper, R. 
10.	*Ravenous, Cooper, R. 
9.	*Change State, Lee, Sharon and Miller, Steve
8.	*Bread Alone, Lee, Sharon and Miller, Steve
7.	*Od Magic, McKillip, Patricia (reread)
6.	*Spells and Sensibility, Noone, K. L. and Murphy, K. S. 
5.	*Revelry, Noone, K. L.
4.	*Fire and Ink, Noone, K. L.
3.	*Some Kind of Magic, Cooper, R. 
2.	*Wyrd and Wild , English, Charlotte E. 
1.	*The Book of Life, Harkness, Deborah (reread)
 
* Ebook

Hanging Fire

Had my sandwich, had my dunk salad (half an apple, handful of baby carrots and five cherry tomatoes cut in half), had my ‘zert — cherry vanilla Haagen-Dazs (!), sitting here piddling at the computer, listening to somebody else’s Steely Dan playlist with four windows open on one claustrophobic monitor screen (YouTube on Firefox playing Steely Dan, a folder of writing and the piece I’m working on, and Chrome with this window open). I’m still straddling computers (the new one’s still on the table with the other of my two monitors). I have moved some stuff but there’s humpty eleven things still to move, including all my fonts. A Steely Dan song “Glamour Profession” which I hadn’t heard before, was playing just now, and I swear I distinctly heard the name Rudy Charisma in the lyrics. But, when I looked them up, nope! Still, it’s a great name, and I know whom I’m going to tease by calling them that . . .

Five down, one to go. June 23. The last round — for a while anyway. Another 3-1/2 years would be fine by me.

This time through I gained 6 pounds between Wednesday and Friday, all of it from the IV fluids. I’ve got one more fluid bolus tomorrow, and about two weeks to get rid of all of it before the “one more time.”

All I want to do is lie in the bed with my feet up reading or watching YouTube videos or sleeping. Friday evening, I finally crashed from all the prednisone at about 10 pm and slept until 4 o’clock Saturday afternoon (occasionally surfacing briefly to offload, before submerging back into the depths). And dreaming at about 90 miles an hour. (I’d push myself awake through the cobwebs of some of the strangest dreams and waddle off to the en suite wondering, where did that come from?) I get so much fluid so fast that I’m in borderline fluid overload for days until my poor kidneys can catch up. The slightest exertion makes me puff and blow like a steam locomotive (I think I can–I think I can–I think I can –), not because I’m breathless — my oxygen saturation is over 95% most of the time — but because fluid is backing up into my lungs. It’s like being in congestive heart failure but there’s nothing wrong with my heart. It was worse this time than last time. I couldn’t walk 30 yards without having to stop and get my breath. One more time. I can make it one more time.

Needless to say, walking to and from the car and back to the apartment just wears me out because I have no energy. My table is still sitting in the box. The plants are un-repotted. I’ve got a sink full of dirty dishes I need to wash, and a load of laundry to do, but I’m not doing any of it right this now. I have a bad case of mañana. I don’t even have the energy to care.

I’ve switched over to listening to somebody’s YouTube playlist of Fleetwood Mac now. Instead of setting up the new computer on the dining table, what I should have done was moved my tissue dispenser, put the tower there, and just switched the one monitor over. I’d still have to juggle mice and keyboards, but I could do everything from my desk. I may still move it over, because I really need to get switched over. Google has now started not letting Windows Live Mail sign into my personal email address either. And I keep getting this “Please sign in” popup like every 15 minutes. You put in the right password and it just blows you off, tells you it’s the wrong password and wants you to sign in again and it’s driving me crazy.

For those who have just tuned in, a word of explanation about the playa lakes we have in our parks here in town. We only average about 16 inches of rain here, but we get it in big gobs. A thunderstorm will roll through and drop up to an inch in about thirty minutes. It’s gotta go somewhere. The city has put in storm drains and run pipe to discharge this runoff into the playa lakes dotted about the city. They’ve set up pumps at the lakes so they can adjust the water levels in the lakes and spread the load as the town is big enough that one part can get more rain than another. Because we get so much so fast, intersections and underpasses can become impassible because of the storm runoff in as little as fifteen minutes (except the stupid pickups that have the ground clearance to just roar on through and drown out people’s car engines with their waves). (Like bratty four-year-old boys stomping in puddles to splash everybody.) You can’t swim in the lakes; they’re too full of algae and probably contain broken glass. They’re mostly for the local and migratory waterfowl and the Canada geese, and the city keeps ducks and some “regular” geese out on them during the summer. They’re nice to look at, too.

In the knitting news, there is knitting news, but not much.

I finally finished the baby blanket. It still needs to be blocked. I haven’t started on the dress yet. The yarn is all caked up, I’ve got the needles out, I have the ‘structions printed out all in a plastic baggie ready to go, but I’m still waiting for a few more brain cells to report for duty. The three currently on shift are pooped.

A Change-Up Pitch

I thought I was being proactive submitting a refill to the VA for the prednisone I need to take with my chemo, and I thought two weeks would be enough time to get it before I needed it. Guess again. The holiday weekend threw a monkey wrench in that plan. When Tuesday’s mail was put up, the refill still hadn’t come, so I scrambled over to the VA to plead my case. Lo, and behold, I had no problem getting it, as well as four sacks of groceries besides on the way back. (And remembered to take my cart with me when I left to begin my mad scramble.) (And forgot to get butter.)

Wednesday was an uphill day. I had to be at JACC at 8 o’clock in the morning of a cloudy day with a chance of T-storms. (We’re having one as I write this, as it happens. Flashy bangies coming right up, hopefully with a side of rain, hold the hail, please.) Same old drill: Wait in the big waiting room till they call me into the phlebotomy area to get the access put into my chemo port and get blood drawn for labs. Then it’s across to the doctors’ offices to wait in their waiting room until I get called into my oncologist’s exam room. He was delighted that I’m tolerating the Rituxan so well and apparently, my labs are very good because instead of getting COP one day and Rituxan and Udenyca the next, I get to wait in one waiting room for an hour, wait in another waiting room for an hour, before I even get back to the infusion area. By then it’s almost 1 o’clock. I’ve gotten most of my sandwich and Cheetos eaten while I’m still in the waiting room. It’s nearly 2 o’clock before I’m back in my chair with my phone plugged in, my ear buds in and my tunes going, and I’m knocking back a handful of prednisone tabs. I get the decadron first. Next is the Rituxan, which is dissolved in about three-fourths of a liter of saline (I get it one drip at a time and get my blood pressure taken every 15 minutes until I’ve had half of it –in case of side effects — then it gets cranked up to 3 drips at a time) followed by a 10-minute line flush with plain saline. By then it’s sneaking up on 5 o’clock and the few people (including me) who aren’t done yet are all moved down to one end so the 4 nurses who will stay late can keep an eye on us, because I’ve still got cyclophosphamide and a line flush, and the Vincristine and a line flush to go before my port access gets taken out and I finally hit the pavement at 6:15 to slosh my way home. I got a lot of knitting done on the baby blanket edging though (only two panels left!), finished reading a book, and took a little nap because I only got about 5 hours of sleep Tuesday night. (I haven’t slept since my nap Wednesday and it’s the wee owls of Friday already. I spent Wednesday evening and night with the foot of my bed raised to keep my legs emptied out so my ankles won’t balloon.

I made a brief appearance Thursday for my shot of Udenyca to get my white blood cell count back up after the chemo crashed it. I was in and out in an hour. On the way home, I picked up the butter I forgot and five or six other things I needed, paid my mom’s beauty saloon tab, and got a free hair trim in exchange for a little natter with the stylist. My hair is long enough that the natural curl is starting a wave in back and the ends were getting raggedy, so she neatened it for me.

My poor little kidneys (and my my three working brain cells) are doing the hampster wheel thing trying to catch up after Wednesday’s fluid dump, and I’ve had to hit the Chai tea and Coca Cola so the caffeine will get out and push. Friday, I’ve got to be there at 9 a.m. for my first liter of saline to help flush this mess out.

Amazon had this little console table that’s long enough and tall enough to clear the under-window HVAC unit and it came Thursday. I’ve got to repot 2 plants and then they’ll all go on the console table (some assembly required) right next to the window. The Italian stone(d) pine is doing the snake dance trying to get to the light and it needs to be closer to and farther down along the window sill where the dining table isn’t (and the tree outside isn’t) to get the most available sunlight. I got it when I was in the other apartment and it had a good sunny window there. The windows in this apartment have a tree in the way.

The table is 48 inches long, so I’ll line my little green darlings up on it in order of how much light they need. The table assembly and the repotting can wait until Saturday. (It’s raining now. Yay! We’ll take every drop we can get.)

I’m going to try to finish the baby blanket Friday and maybe start the little dress Sunday. If I can get my rear in gear and the creeks don’t rise, I may be able to do a dress in the same yarn and same pattern for the new baby’s older sister (they’re 16 months apart!). Matching red dresses that will fit them right at Christmas time — Christmas card photo! I have enough of the red yarn (Malabrigo Sock in Tiziano red) to do two dresses. I also have a freebie skein of Malabrigo Sock in Turner green, and I’m thinking maybe headbands with some crochetted holly leaves and berries . . . . We’ll see what kind of time (and energy and brain cells) I have. (Boy, the rain is really coming down now! Yipee!)

Five down; one more to go.